Friday, October 31, 2008

Thursday, October 30, 2008

I forgot to tell you....

One of the most important parts of our doctor's appointment.....We're DUE on JUNE 5th!! So for anyone reading through the old posts, and wondering why I was 8 weeks a few posts ago, and then 8 weeks again.....the doctor calculates how far along you are based on the date of conception, while the websites calculate it based on the first date of your last period. So I'm just as far along as I thought I was, just counting in a different way.

June is a great month...lots of birthdays that month! And Sean just helped me to figure out that when I was 7 weeks and 6 days I was finishing my eighth week. And now today I'm 8 weeks and 6 days, so I'm finishing my 9th week. Math is not my strong suit. So just take a look at that little picture over there on the right----> it'll be sure to let you know how Tucker's coming along!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Go Phillies!!

What luck! Our wonderful friends Sus and Matt were able to help Sean with tickets to see his beloved Phillies in the World Series! So immediately after our doctor's appointment, and a fun dinner with the Campion-Weiss clan, Sean hopped a red-eye to New Jersey. The timing couldn't have been more perfect, because he was able to take his nephew and his dad to the World Series AND he surprised some of our East Coast friends and family with our BIG NEWS! The first picture is of Alec when he realized that inside the water bottle was a ticket to the World Series. The second picture is of Nan and Pop-Pop right after Sean told them they were going to be grandparents again! And a congratulatory kiss from Shelby, who will soon go from being the littlest cousin, to a big cousin!

Sean had an incredible time in Jersey/Philly, and was sweet enough to eat a Philly Cheese Steak for his pregnant wife! He also had a full Jewish brunch at the deli, which I made him describe for me in detail....since I won't be having lox for the next 7 months! Even in the wind and the rain, the Phillies won the World Series. Sean ended up watching the first half of Game 5 in Philly, but had to finally fly home after the game was suspended for bad weather. We did watch the second half with Matt and Susie in P-Town, and Sean could finally celebrate a Phillies victory....though he was a little far from the action...and the cheese steaks! His new vote is to name our future child after the MVP...."Cole"....we'll see :)

Thursday, October 23, 2008

First Ultrasound Appointment!

Today we saw Tucker for the first time! (Here we are in the doctor's you like my stylish gown?) Our (very tiny) little baby was the most adorable blob we've ever seen! His....her.....heart was beating so fast and we could see it pulsing like a rapid shadow on the screen. I have to admit, it was a bit like that "Friends" episode, where it was hard to know what we were really looking at....but the doctor said that everything looked great! We are officially 7 weeks and 6 days today (based on the baby's measurements), and now we know that we conceived Tucker when we were in Nantucket!! OK, well...we were on our Boston/Nantucket trip, at least. It was probably one of the days that we were in Boston, but Tucker just sounds better than "Marlowe" (our hotel) or "Freedom Trail".

As part of our first appointment, they had to draw blood. I am not a good sport about this. BUT I was determined to make the sacrifice for Tucker. When we walked in to the lab I tried to warn the girl as fast as I could. "I pass out when I have blood drawn I need to lie down and you have to use a butterfly needle and my veins usually collapse and I'm really scared and I just want to warn you". All in one breath. And she says "Girl, you're pregnant now. This is nothing compared to what you're gonna go through soon. Get up on the table." And then she proceeded to take 6...SIX...vials of blood! But she did find my vein on only the second try, and managed to not have my vein collapse until vial 5. I have a nasty little bruise (Tucker's mama looks kinda like a heroin addict), but I'm feeling pretty brave right now.

We'll go back on November 19th for our 12 week appointment, which will put us a little further into "the safe zone". We'll actually have two different appointments, because our doctor recommends that all of his patients have a special screening for Down Syndrome via a fancy new ultrasound that a different hospital provides. After that, we will go see our regular doctor so that he can do our routine check-up as well. For now, we are hoping, praying, and dreaming about our little Tucker. We feel so close to him (her??) already, and will never forget what it felt like to watch Tucker's little heart beating on the screen for the very first time. Sean held my hand, and we stared at the tiny shadow that will become the light of our lives.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Chag Sameach

I love working at a Jewish organization. Today we had a Sukkah Party, and our Rabbi (yes, our agency has it's very own spiritual advisor) led a wonderful afternoon service/get together to celebrate Sukkot. He explained that this was the only time that G-d actually commanded us to be happy, and that after the pensive times of Yom Kippur and Rosh Hashanah, Sukkot was a time for happiness and get this....fertility!! Why yes it is! It's so nice to feel part of something like this, especially after 10 years of working with agencies that do Secret Santa and Easter egg hunts, but look at you like you have three eyeballs when you talk about Chanukah or Passover. There we were in the courtyard, looking at the beautiful Sukkah, and sharing the spirit of Judaism. Oh, and the sweet desserts didn't hurt either! I also heard a fantastic rumor that for our agency's Chanukah party, they have a special kosher caterer who brings in...LATKES!

Baubee's Corner

Two great tips from Baubee today:

1) This is how to spell NAUSEOUS. Who knew?

2) Low-fat vanilla wafers may help nausea. Now if I eat them with banana pudding, does that count for my daily serving of fruit?

One great tip from yesterday:

1) I am growing another human being in my body. It makes sense that I am going to be a little moody and out-of-sorts. Are you reading this, husband??

Womb Update

Thanks to the Internet, here is the update that I received by email this morning. Anything in capital letters would be my own snide comments:

Fetal development in pregnancy week 8: You've got one whole inch of baby inside of you! Your little embryo has finally reached the one-inch mark (30mm). And if it were possible to take a peek, you could actually see your tiny baby without a telescope! What’s more, your baby is finally starting to take on some very distinct human features. For starters, their little tail (really just the spinal cord) has disappeared completely. It’s nice to know your baby can no longer be mistaken for a sea creature! Additionally, both their toes and fingers are prominent with very little, if any, webbing. Upper and lower limbs all show recognizable joints (elbows and knees) and the lower limb bones are starting to ossify. But don’t expect your baby to resemble either parent quite yet. Right now, your baby’s head is disproportionately larger than the rest of their body SEAN WOULD SAY THAT THIS MEANS BABY DIRECTLY RESEMBLES ME--making up almost half of your little one’s height and weight!

And how's mom doing? Your slightly-larger-than-a-cherry embryo is also starting to have a physical impact on you this week—and not just hormonally, as you may be noticing a slight bulge at your midline THANK GOD I'M NOT IMAGINING THINGS. COULD I BE THE FIRST PREGNANT WOMAN EVER WHO WANTS TO RUN OUT AND BUY ELASTIC WAISTBANDS NOW??-- mostly from water retention AWW DAMN! THAT'S IT?. Most people won't even notice the subtle change to your belly's shape ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY'RE DISTRACTED BY MY ENORMOUS STRIPPER-BOOBS...HORMONES, ANYONE??, but if you have been extra moody lately UMM...SEE PREVIOUS CORN-DOG POST, that may start to subside this week, as the placenta is beginning to take responsibility for your baby’s hormone production. This means your body will soon be able to relax a bit from its over-production of hormones as the placenta starts to regulate your baby’s hormones-- allowing your body to focus on producing more normal levels of hormones for yourself. I MEAN REALLY PEOPLE, WHAT IS NORMAL??

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Live....from New York...

Amy Poehler is the coolest pregnant woman on the planet. Go to You Tube. Find the Saturday Night Live skit with Sarah Palin and a ten months pregnant Amy Poehler. Laugh your ass off.

That woman rocks. And no doubt, she will go into labor tomorrow after not one, but two, singing/dancing/gyrating/ass-slapping/eskimo-bashing skits. LOVE. IT.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Corn Dogs...and Dogs

Home. Lovely loud restaurant on a busy corner in the Castro. Mmmm....comfort food. First pregnancy binge. My husband ordered a spinach salad appetizer. Pregnant Mama? "I'll have the corn dog appetizer please". 8 mini corn-dogs. There is nothing more embarrassing than sitting in front of a plate of 7 naked corn-sticks. Except for one thing...

A Saturday night in the Castro brings some fantastic people-watching. Right next to us, the man wearing an "Everyone loves an Asian boy" t-shirt turns to his date and tells him "I do have the butterfly wings. I'll wear those." And then, what's this walking through the restaurant? A woman....and her DOG? Plain as day, here she comes to take a seat! With a little white fluffy dog on a leash. In the carpeted, $20/plate restaurant. While I'm eating my corn dogs?! Hello?! Health code violation??? Now granted, I don't like animals. I do like Rylee. But other than that, I pretty much hate fuzzy creatures that can't speak. And yet....there is still NO reason for a woman to waltz into a nice restaurant on a Saturday night with a DOG. So there I sit, 7 and 3/4 weeks pregnant and not the most rational human being at this point. And I am FUMING. I start furiously telling Sean "She can't have a DOG in here! This is a direct violation of health code! Who does she think she is?! Where is our waiter?" I am PISSED. Hormonal, maybe. But losing it. Sean starts trying to calm me down. Sean. My husband who often screams at people while driving, refused to pay the ladies at the nail salon when they charged him extra for "buffing", frequently gives waiters/taxi drivers/retail workers/the automated voice on the phone/ANYBODY a piece of his mind.....THAT husband starts telling ME to calm down. "Maybe she's lonely. And the dog is all she has" he says. "Then she should stay home and be lonely where her dog belongs. This is a restaurant. We are going to pay more than $50 for dinner. This is a health code vi-o-lation! WHERE is the manager?!" And that is when my husband (MY husband, who has caused me to walk out of stores/restaurants/nail salons as he's yelling at people like he's some tough guy from Jersey) says to me "Sweetheart, please don't embarrass me. You're over-reacting, and causing a scene."

I have never in my wildest dreams come close to embarrassing my husband. Until tonight. So there I was, laughing at my pregnant/hormonal/wildly psychotic self. And eating the last corn-dog.

You should have seen the note I left for our waiter on the back of our receipt ;)

Friday, October 17, 2008's what's for dinner.

I can't wait until I have my very first ultrasound. Because at this moment, the only thing other than a drug store pee test that confirms what my body is SCREAMING right now, is the fact that I am EXHAUSTED. Sit on the toilet at 7 am and fall asleep with my head against the wall tired. Seriously contemplate the amount of crawl space under my desk tired. Refuse to watch Saturday Night Live Weekend Update Thursday even though Sean wants to and he never wants to...tired. Call in sick to work today so that I can lie on the couch all day and watch back-to-back episodes of A Baby Story tired. Heart is pounding and I'm exhausted from walking up the stairs in our own frickin house tired.

Oh, and the foooood issues. Let me give my disclaimer: Thank god I am not actually barfing. Thank. God. Seriously. God. I really appreciate you. The 18 people in the workshops that I give regularly at work, they thank you. The clients that pay $140 an hour to listen to me talk....they thank you. My sorry-ass pride that would be mortified if my husband heard me retching up my breakfast.....thanks you. However. That does not mean that I am not reallythisclose to yakking ALL DAY LONG. Let's just say that prior to being pregnant, I was an eater. I love food. All types of food. New food. Old comfort food. Ethnic food. American grill. All of it. Now....on any given day at any given moment, any possible type of food...just the THOUGHT of a certain food.....makes my stomach gurgle and a horrible grimace slide across my face. The pita bread triangles on our counter today? Straight in the trash because they were LOOKING AT ME and I was going to barf. The bananas that sounded really good three days ago? Rotting on the banana tree. The bean and cheese burrito that was delicious last night, ended up in the trash this afternoon after spending 5 minutes on my lunch plate. NOTHING sounds good. Brushing my teeth makes me want to vomit. Smelling the nastiness of someone's microwaved lunch at work? An all-out assault on my senses. A banana-strawberry smoothie from my favorite Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf? Too sweet. The chicken that Sean made for dinner last night? Too chicken-y. And yet I go from barfy to starving in oh, 3 minutes. Tonight, my friends are Indian food and white cheddar popcorn. None of which I have right now. They just sound really good. God bless my husband, who was smart enough to offer up a snack of cinnamon graham crackers and cream cheese a few minutes ago. With a sparkly pink lemonade chaser. Perfect. Now can we order some curry?! Tucker is starving!!

Mmmmm....Goat Cheese

I love this little raspberry-sized baby that is growing in my belly. Even though it is causing me to feel two deep breaths away from barfing...all day. I love our little raspberry. But I also love goat cheese. Goat cheese on a club sandwich. Goat cheese on a spinach and strawberry salad. Goat cheese stuffed squash blossoms with a little pesto and pine nuts (for those of you keeping track, that was my last goat cheese meal...with Mom on our First Annual Mother/Daughter spa trip to La Costa...and yes, I was probably already pregnant then, but didn't know it, so the amazing appetizer that I will dream about for the next 9 months DID NOT COUNT). My wonderful husband even found a way to get me to eat eggs on a semi-regular basis. Half of a container of crumbled goat cheese scrambled in. But not any more. I am now facing a trial separation from my favorite food on earth.

Speaking of food....let's look at all of the things I ate the week before I knew I was pregnant, ALL of which are now forbidden. Runny eggs benedict at the Hard Rock Hotel in San Diego. Breakfast of champions for my Roomie and I. Caesar salad, which for some odd reason I craved on a regular basis at that point. I think Tucker wants goat cheese. And eggs benny. He's overdue for a crisp Caesar with lots of parm. If I have one more saltine, I'm gonna run screaming into the nearest cheese shop and rob them.

Monday, October 13, 2008

Who is Tucker?

Oh my god! Do they already know that it's a boy?! NO, no, no my friends. Hold your horses. We haven't even had our first ultrasound yet!! But with something the size of a blueberry causing my entire body to FLIP OUT, I figured our little...something....deserved an honest nickname. Our "embryo" sounds too much like high school biology. Our "baby" sounds like too much of a fantasy, considering I haven't done much more than pee on a stick...even if it WAS twice. Still, our little, know....needed a name.

So why Tucker?

Sean and I took a trip to Nantucket about a month ago. We knew (well, we hoped) that our lives would change when I got pregnant, and we wanted a last "hurrah" of sorts. Nantucket was beautiful, and relaxing, and the perfect getaway. The trip began with a great visit to our dear friends in Boston, and we had some pretty funny talks with them about baby names and (ahem) "conception tricks". Of course, they are the proud parents of two absolutely darling (and smart!) little boys, so my husband was dying to know "how they did it". Literally. But I digress. So there we were in Nantucket, on a 17 mile bike ride. Yes, I was on the BIKE ride. Riding a bike. With a basket. I was hot shit. But right around mile 15, on the 547th UP part of the up/down/up/down hills, I was sucking wind. My husband, out of nowhere, turns around and screams into the wind, "Hey, if we get pregnant here on Nantucket, and have a boy...we should name him Tucker!" It was enough to help me not die on the last few miles.

Now, for all those tossing the name around in their heads, testing it out on their tongues....don't worry....we will probably NOT choose that name. There are so many other contenders. Plus, it's very close to "Fucker", and why would someone ever do that to their kid? But for now.....Tucker it is.

The other day I had an epiphany though.....what if it's.....A GIRL??? She's probably mighty sick of hearing "Tucker" right now.

Saturday, October 4, 2008

Great Expectations

Tucker. Max. Annabelle. Madalyn. We don't yet know what we will call you, but yesterday, on October 3rd, we learned that you were growing inside of me. I had been feeling funny for the past few days...crampy, extra tired, just a hint of nausea. I want to say that I knew, and I think I did. Yesterday at work, I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror and put both hands on my stomach. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, and felt like there was something beyond me happening in my body. I have never been so sure about something in my life, and yet, when I took the test after work, I could not believe my eyes. I made Sean come running down the stairs. I think the first thing I said to him was "I need you to help me make sure I'm not reading this wrong!". We looked at each other with joy and disbelief, and gave each other a huge what?!

We hope and pray that you stay with us, that you grow bigger each day. I want you to find a safe comfy spot in there, and grow healthy and strong. I will do everything I can to take care of you, and to try not to stress. Sean will help me to eat healthy, and will take care of me, so I can take care of you. We will begin to plan the next steps of our lives...slowly, tentatively, and with the greatest amount of hope.

I believe that I am about 6 weeks pregnant. You are the size of a poppy seed.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008


Is it possible that I want to be pregnant so badly, that I've willed my boobs to hurt and made myself nauseas? How do you even spell nauseas? I felt that way last night too, but it was 99 degrees in Mom's house and I was probably just achy from the massage I had at La Costa. I couldn't relax on the plane home today. Even in the first-class seats (thanks for the upgrade Virgin America!) with the footrests and the fully-reclining backs. I thought maybe I was nauseas. But I'm sure it was only the fact that for the first time ever I was experiencing turbulence while horizontally reclining flat on my back in an airplane. And I had chili for dinner. And mexican food for lunch. No wonder I'm nauseas.

I keep daydreaming the different outcomes of October 6th, when I take the test. Or when my period comes. How I'll be bummed if I'm not pregnant, but will try to pretend that it's totally to be expected. I mean, this is only our very first try. Or how stunned and thrilled I'll be if I am pregnant. Will I scream? Cry? Can we keep it our little secret for a while, before we tell anybody? But then, new worries I'm sure. Will it TAKE? Will it grow? Will it be ok? So much to think about, so much to hope for and pray about. Either way, I know that this will be the beginning of our own journey, whatever that may be.